One of Hannah's friends came for lunch on Sunday. She can't be with her mum at present so I've always said to her that so long as her mum is happy about it I'll be a stand-in-mum until her own mum is able to be with her again. Hannah's friend bought me a lovely carrot cake that said "Happy Mother's Day" - I thought that was so lovely.
I also got the "Don't tell mum" gift which Noah had made at school - it was a nice flower in a vase, with a rather bent drinking straw stalk where Noah had crammed it into his wardrobe. Hannah and Lily had printed off some lovely photos taken at the Down syndrome ball and also got two new beads for my necklace and Isaac (with the help of Paul and some encouragement from me) gave me two Jodi Piccoult novels that I can read on our holiday to UK. Sam phoned to wish me happy Mother's day and said that he and Anika have just moved into a new flat in Auckland - one with less mould and damp! Beth sent an email to say she and James have found a flat in Sydney - it costs quite a lot more than the whole four bedroomed house we rented here - and has one bedroom and a small bathroom. It is very convenient for uni, train station and a shopping mall.
At lunch time at the last minute (so late in fact that Paul insisted we eat lunch before it got cold before lighting the candles) I thought to get out the candles we use (occasionally) on Friday night when we have our modified Shabbat celebration. This time instead of lighting a candle for each of our children, we lit one for each mother represented round our table. So I lit a candle for my mum Peggy, Paul for his mum Joan, Noah lit one for me, Lily lit one for her birth mum, Vicky, Hannah for Isaac's birth mum, Rachel and for our Rachel's birth mum, Margaretta. Hannah's friend lit one for her mum and then we lit one for the mum of our recent foster children A and U.
We usually remember the kids' birth families in November each year at Thanksgiving, but it seemed a good idea to do it on Mother's Day too. After all I'm sure all the mums mentioned would have been thinking of their children. (Not strictly true actually as in the UK Mother's day has already been, midway through Lent). I think we'll continue it as a family tradition - I do love traditions!
The letter in our church news sheet for Sunday was very good because it didn't just talk about birth mothers - that may have something to do with the vicar having been adopted and being a foster parent!
Which is more difficult?
2 hours ago